I sat here a while ago looking at everything I think I need to do and thinking about the rest. I wondered why it is that I don’t get as much done as I once did. I blamed it on age. I am older you know and I have been ill… But you know, that isn’t it. I can delude myself, but the fact is, I can do every single thing that I need to do.
It isn’t a lack of time. I have every single minute of every single day that I need to accomplish everything that the Lord wants me to accomplish.
My that sounds nice and pietistic. But it’s true. Not only that, it doesn’t mean that I have to give up doing the things I love to do. I don’t need to cut the internet out of my life. I don’t need to stop writing, stop sewing, and stop sleeping.
Furthermore, I believe I can do it without a rigid schedule or a self-imposed reward and punishment system. I don’t have to take away my writing time if I fritter away a couple of hours that I should have been scrubbing or painting or if I forget to do flash cards with Ethan.
I’m a capable woman. I know that sounds insufferably arrogant but frankly, it’s true. Not only that, I think most women are very capable and accomplished if they give themselves half a chance.
You know, I think it’s that stupid pendulum thing. It swings to one extreme or another. We either have women who are “super-women” who try to be all things, to all me all at once, all the time, all by themselves or we have women who are chronic underachievers.
Why is this? Why does human nature tend toward the pendulum rather than the scales? I mean, a pendulum swings back and forth. It rarely hangs straight down unless there is no movement. When in the middle, it sweeps by quickly. It only paues on the right or the left.
Scales, however, are different. Yes, they can be unbalanced in one direction or another, but they’re steady. Scales can also be balanced. You can remove excess from one side, add it to the other, and you achieve balance. One side doesn’t work harder than the other.
Capability. I am capable of exhibiting capability and am incapable of surviving for long without it. I’m just not capable of making that sentence work the way I wanted to. 😉